Tuesday, July 12, 2011

The Herd Overheard

Claire (doing fancy moves on the elliptical machine): “Mom, look!”

Me: “Wow.  What a great trick.”

Claire: “You should sell us to the trick store.”  3/25/11


(On the phone with her grandma, discussing Sandy’s upcoming birthday)

Ruby: “But how much will you be, Lita?  ‘Cause I’m guessing you’ve run out of fingers.”  4/5/11


Ruby, telling me about needing to pass some jeans down to Claire:

“My legs are getting fatter; like yours, probably.”  4/13/11


Claire: “Mom, what’s a birth stone?  Is it a stone you take a birth on?”  4/20/11


Claire, eating monster mouths (sliced apples w/peanut butter and marshmallows): “I call this marshmallow ‘Grandma,’ ‘cause it’s old and crusty.”  4/21/11


Claire: “Haley, doesn’t that dress itch you?”

Haley: “Yes.”

Claire: “Then why are you still wearing it?”

Haley: “Because I have to dance.”  4/23/11


Haley (at bedtime): “Mom, can you kiss me? . . . since I just can’t kiss myself.”  4/26/11


Me: “Did you know that chicks come out of eggs?”

Ruby: “We knew that for years.”  4/27/11


Haley, sitting on a pile of library books: “I’m hiding these since I can’t trust Ian.  He will drool over them and ruin them all up.”  4/28/11  (“Since” has been one of Haley’s favorite words this last year.)


(Background: I have 3 different kinds of towels in the kitchen—each with its own use.  Claire had just washed her hands and I was telling her which towel to use.)

Me: “Here.  This one’s the hand towel.”

Claire: “Hmm.  Which one is the foot towel?”  4/28/11


Me: “Is this Haley’s toothbrush?”

Ruby: “Let me see. . . I have a special way to tell. . . (long pause). . . if it’s ruined, it’s Haley’s.”  5/1/11


Haley to her dad:  “I’m growing boogers on my shirt!”  5/1/11


Haley (proud of herself): “Mom, I hugged Ian like a normal person!”  5/2/11


Claire, obviously searching for something.

Me: “What are you looking for?”

Claire: “I heard something over here that sounded like a toad’s foot.”  5/1/11


Ruby: “I am a lazy bird.  No one can stop me.”  (Ruby went on to express that being lazy is doing nothing.  Ever. All the time.)  5/5/11


Claire, showing me a tall stack of blocks.  “Mom, look!”

Me: “Wow.  That’s a big tower.”

Claire: “It’s not a tower, it’s a dad.”  5/7/11


Ruby: “Mom, it hurts my ears when Claire screams like a crocodile bit off her arm.”  3/10/11 (Ruby, you’re not alone.)


Ruby, pointing to the roof of her mouth: “My top lung hurts.”  5/23/11


(The kids are all in the shower together.)

Me: “Ruby, would you please wash Ian?”

Ruby: “Mom, I love washing Ian.  It’s like washing a pig.”  5/25/11


Casey (After Haley runs into a wall): “What hurts?”

Haley: “My owie!”  5/25/11


At the drive-thru: “That'll be $3.05 at the window.”

Claire (with interest): “Did she say, ‘I’ll climb out the window?”  6/7/11


Claire: “Mom, I just love watching you . . . but it’s kinda boring.”  6/18/11


Claire, pensively recollecting a statement she’d heard after watching a ballerina’s dancing presentation: “She said she danced with her whole body, but she didn’t dance with her eyes or her lips.”  (Pause.)  “And she didn’t dance with her nose, either.”  6/21/11


Sharing what we’re thankful for, Claire is excited that Ian will grow up to be a man because he can get married.

Casey: “You should hope that when he grows up, he’ll stand up for his big sisters.”

Claire, nonplussed: “He already does stand up for us.  Lots of times.”  6/25  (Do we have another literal thinker in the house, or what?!)

Claire, discussing love with Ruby: “I don’t think I’ve ever fallen in love.” (Pause.)  “But I might have fallen in love with Daddy.  And I might have fallen in love with Ian.”  6/27/11


Claire, handing the phone to me: “Daddy wants to talk to you again. I think he must be falling in love with you again.” 6/30ish/11


Claire, commenting on the upside of getting soap in one’s eyes: “Well, after you get the soap out, at least your eyes will smell good.”  7/6/11


I was explaining to the girls several of the qualities of breastmilk that make it such a perfect food for babies.

Claire (with surprise): “It’s alive?!?  You mean it can walk around and it has a nose?”  7/6/11


Ruby and Claire, playing “finding a baby”

Claire: “Pretend you saw me and I was so cute.”

“And pretend you took off my headband, and I was even cuter.”  7/6/11