Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I Was about to Post This to My Other Blog . . .

But after I finished typing it, I realized it belonged better here. And the post from this morning, which is on this blog, probably better belongs on my birth one. I'm getting confused. But I'm not going to think about it any more.

Plugging away at my Bradley certification. I have a little over a week before the 4 day workshop in Denver. Several people have advised me that the key to success in completing the Provisional Affiliate phase with Bradley is to finish the requirements and turn in the packet on the first day of the workshop so I can begin teaching right away.

Being a procrastinator, for the last four months, I have been lolling my way through a book or two here, a report or two there, and the occasional hospital evaluation. In July, I began to get more purposeful and am now tying up the loose ends (final drafts, tweaking formatting). The strangest thing is that I am not overwhelmed. I just keep plugging away though the work seems to stretch out longer and longer. This is not like me. Perhaps it is because I find the subject matter so interesting and because I am gleefully looking forward to teaching my first class, but I am usually getting pretty stressed by this point, figuring there's no way I'll be able to do it all.

At least that's how it is in my house most of the time. The girls and I have been home today to try to get the house back together, put away laundry, cook 20 pounds of chicken and catch up on dishes. And I've managed to cook the chicken and run a dishwasher load so far, but the house looks no better than it did yesterday. And I'm starting to give up on the "putting the house back together" idea as I sit here for a breather, the day half-over.

Case has been working long hours the last couple weeks. One night last week, he didn't get home till 2 a.m. (then promptly turned around to go back at 7 a.m.). Today, he packed some clothes in case it gets late enough that he should just stay the night. The project they're working on should be done in another month or so.

Funny thing is that though it is not exactly great timing, in some ways it is the perfect timing. He's not home most evenings, which makes it more conducive for me to study and catch up on certification work. And I don't feel as badly if the house is in utter disarray (which it has been more than a few times), since he is not here to see it much. I am able to enjoy some time with the girls during the day, knowing that I have a chunk of time to work on my homework after they go to bed. (Much of my stress, I find, comes from feeling like I'm being prevented from doing what I should be doing. Of course, this would be faulty thinking on my part to feel like my children are "in the way" of me doing my "real work," but it really helps to have time carved out for such a purpose. It doesn't hang over me like a huge weight like it would if I were just trying to fit it in here and there.)

The last few weeks, Case and I have reinstated my weekly "night off," which kinda went by the wayside after about a month of doing it in May. Being able to get away has contributed a great deal to my progress with the reading and reports. Strange how a few hours away from home can make such a dent in a pile of work. Oh, and it also refreshes me to have a break from parenting once in a while. Sometimes, just an hour or two will help me regain the desire to jump back in with newness of purpose and passion. But if it's been too long since I've had a break, as my dear friend has observed, by the time we realize I need a break, I am already "broken." The key is to catch it before it gets that bad. Otherwise I feel like I need a few days away, not just an hour.

Claire and Haley are up and we're going to fold the laundry and cut up and freeze the chicken. Well, maybe just I will.

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