Until I had my third baby, I really didn't feel a severe need to find other moms to relate to. Whether women had yet to have children or had many mattered little to me as far as friendship or conversation. After the birth of Haley, I began to deal with many things, not for the first time, but in a different capacity, and began to strive to find more women who could relate in some way to the situations in which I found myself.
Enter the internet. As any mom of tiny ones can attest to, the internet is one of the most amazing inventions for stay-at-home-moms! It allows me to stay connected and have adult conversation, sometimes even every day, and sometimes even deep conversations! Without the internet, I believe I would be in a corner, babbling and drooling along with my 8-month-old by now. There is just so little opportunity or time for meanigful adult interaction in this season of life.
What I have found especially refreshing is a few blogs that I've discovered where the women are down-to-earth and don't put on airs or give the impression that they are pretending to be something they are not. I discovered one of these such blogs last fall, and lo and behold, the woman had just had her third baby a few months after I had had Haley. There is so much encouragement to be had by reading something that someone else wrote that I can relate to in so many ways. It is validating to read someone else saying it, as opposed to trying to express it myself (as my confused non-mom friend looks on with furrowed brow and nods obligatorily).
Not that I don't appreciate these friends. I believe it is especially helpful to have friends in different seasons, like I had when I was single and newly married. In fact, I believe my mothering, homemaking and wife-ing would suffer even more, were it not for all the time spent since childhood with women in different stages of life. On both sides, it can be very good. The single friend can be so helpful in ways a married-with-children friend cannot, and let's just say that spending an afternoon with a mom and her lots-o-tots can be quite eye-opening and helpful for the single or married-without-children friend! I know, and my eyes continue to be opened as I remember back to my single days and times spent with my friends-with-children these many years later. (I believe, were I to go back, I would not raise my eyebrows quite as much as I did then. ;)
But there is just something about that woman who can relate on so many levels with my same struggles. Her mutual struggle and similar situation makes me that much more apt to think of her as my friend, though we may never have met. (Casey likes to call these blog people my "imaginary friends," and he's right, to some extent, because they are by far more my friend than I am thiers. Some don't even know who I am!)
One of the blogs that I will periodically stop by has a really good post today. One that comforted and encouraged me. If you are a mom of small children, you, too, may be heartened by her post. And if you do not have three, or even one child, it may be a good post to read in order to prepare or relate to friends who are mothers. I pray either way, you will be encouraged by this woman's transparency.
1 comment:
Hi Sarah,
It was great seeing you at the craft show and now seeing a picture of your three little ones. I am so glad you will be teaching Bradley! What a blessing you are to me!
Love,
Cheryl Walker
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