Sunday, April 3, 2011

The Herd Overheard

Claire, after taking a bite out of a donut: “It’s like a Boppy!”  9/27/10

Ruby, playing with magnetic letters (as though they are people—nothing is safe from becoming an action figure at our house):
“We had leg surgery tomorrow.  That’s why we tip over.”  9/27/10

Haley, as the blender startles 3-mo. Ian, making him cry:
“Mom!  Don’ scare Ian a smoothie! I don’ wike it!”  9/30/10

Claire, tattling: “Haley hit me with a rock!”
(after a pause)
“It’s a beautiful rock, but that was unkind.”  (Claire loves rocks) 10/13/10

Claire, when asked if the report was true that she’d scratched and hit Haley:
(Emphatically) “No!  I did NOT!  I only slapped her face!”  10/14/10

Haley (with a cold):  “I need to blow my nose, Mom, because my nose is coming out.”  10/14/10
also: “My nose is running out,” and “I just have a nose in my boogers.”  10/19/10

Claire, coloring a fish-in-an-aquarium-picture:  “This is gonna be mold at the bottom, just like in our bathtub.”  10/16/10

Ruby, wistfully: “I love pets.  All I have is pet bugs, but I want to have a pet what could stay alive all winter.”  10/25/10

Claire, during calendar time, noticing there aren’t many more days left in October: “When we run out of days, will we die?”  10/26/10

Claire, after I was gruff with Haley: “Mom, you’re not supposed to do that.  Remember, you need to let the peace of God rule in your heart, and be thankful?”  10/27/10

Ruby, having wished on a star the night before: “Mom, my wish didn’t come true, to fly up in a basket.  That’s too bad.”  11/1/10

Claire, holding a wooden spoon from their kitchen set: “This is my gun.  It’s automatic.”  11/1/10

Ruby, explaining to me what she meant when she came in from playing outside and told me she was “soaking hot.”
“It means I have tears coming out of me for having two jackets on.”  11/14/10

Serving the girls slices of the apple cinnamon bread brought by the neighbor:
Me: “Wasn’t it kind for Daddy to fix Sharon’s laptop, and wasn’t it kind for her to bake Daddy some bread?”
Claire, puzzled: “How did she make her laptop into bread?”  11/17/10

Claire, in pain: “Two of my ears are hurting.”  11/29/10

Ruby, coloring with me: “I still have more imaginations to color.”  11/29/10

Haley, singing (to the tune of Mary Had a Little Lamb): “Mary had a muffin man, muffin, man, muffin maaaan. . .    12/1/10

Haley, playing with her pretend camera (batteries dying): “Oh!  My cheeseball is broken!”  12/10/10

Ruby, discussing our trip to Colorado: “It’s gonna take forever till we get to the ‘nother world . . . . . . Mom, get ready for this hard trip, because it will be a disaster.”  12/13/10

Haley: “Mommy!  I burp!”
Me: “Yes.  What do we say when we burp?”
Haley: “Thank you, burp.”  1/2/11

Claire: “Last time we went to church, I forgot my notebook, so I had to just sit there with my rock.”   1/2/11

Reviewing yesterday’s science experiment on matter:
Me: “Was the ice solid, liquid or gas?”
Ruby: “It had a shape and you could hold it. . . . .  It was a solid.”
Claire (whose eyes have a light-bulb-over-the-head-look):
“Poop is a solid.”  1/13/2011

Haley, upon hearing the telephone ring:
“It’s Mr. Daddy.”  1/28/11

(While Claire and Ruby play that they are moms.)
Me: “How many kids do you have?”
Claire: “Just two.”
Me: “And how do you like that?”
Claire: “Good. ‘Cause if I had three, I’d be like, ‘I need to sell one of these kids. . .’”
Ruby: “If I had three, I would say, ‘I’m so nervous, I have to put one of you to bed.’”  (For the record, I have never said either of these. )Smile  2/9/11

Claire (to Haley, who is wearing a dress-up dress): “May I have a turn wearing that?”
Haley: “No, Claire.  First I have to marry to Ian.”  3/1/11

Daddy to the girls as they discuss police officers: “I was riding in a car that was pulled over today.  Do you know what two people weren’t wearing in that car?”
Ruby: “Clothes?”  (Also for the record, the correct answer was seatbelts.) Smile 3/1/11

Haley (making small-talk while I change her diaper): “I don’t like to eat my poop.” 3/6/11

Claire (looking out the window of  a crowded restaurant): Dad, Look!  That person’s smoking!”
Ruby: “But they’re already old.  They’re probably going to die soon anyway.”  3/3/11

Haley (stepping out into the pungent country air at a friend’s house): “Somebody pooped out here.”
{demandingly} “Who pooped out here?!?”
{more demandingly, as we make it to the car} “Who did it!?!?!”  3/14/11

Haley (pretending one action figure is speaking to another): “Do you know the muffin man?”  3/19/11

Haley (after having tooted while eating her lunch):
“S’cuse me.  That was my carrot tooting.”  3/14/11


cowartclan said...

Those girls are so FUNNY!! Good fo you at keeping track of all of the comments.

Anonymous said...

How funny, Sarah! We especially liked the one about the person smoking. Kids just say what they think, which can be refreshing or embarrasing!

Love you all,

Karin said...

Oh, man, I am laughing so hard. Rocks, poop, one-too-many-children - it's all so funny. I'm glad you posted one of these again:)

Anonymous said...

Thanks Sarah, it makes me miss the girls even more.

Rebekah B said...

SO funny! I love it! They'll thank you one day when they get to read the things they said... :) Miss you guys!

Debo said...

I had to come back and peruse these again...for a good laugh. LOVED the one about the beautiful rock...and the smoking man!?! Ah, Ruby is so matter of fact...perhaps she will be a very pragmatic woman. I also hate it when I get pulled over and realize I am not wearing any clothes!